WEEK 8 NOTES:
Endless Futility 90 Bromantic Ballsquad 82
I fucking won a game! For this week at least, I'll cut out the whining emails about my unlucky fantasy performance. Donovan Mcnabb (20) and the chicago D (26...an excellent bye week pickup) carried my can of whoop ass to Steuber's doorstep. Two of steuber's WR's had an outstanding day (wayne with 21 and Vjax with 17), but going into Monday night, he needed Lance Moore to score 9 for the tie. Alas, he scored 1, but apparently he was hurt anyway. What a pussy. Steuber, I'd like to hear how the birthday bash on the beach went. Maybe you or Trey can post a recap in the comments with pictures of scantily clad women playing beach volleyball.
Standings: Steuber is now in 5th place with a 4-4 record and 669 points scored. I'm still in 12th place, but my record improved to 2-6, and I've scored 679 pts.
I am milton Waddams 112 Pitchman 85
Oh, whiteford, how the mighty have fallen (you were never really mighty...but AP's good). That's three L's in a row. AP got 19, and Mark Sanchez got 24, but Boldin is still probing your ass with inanimate objects (2 pts...man has he sucked this year). Lenny, you had a dominating performance, with 7 of your players in double digits (including 30 from mjd). Only 1pt from torry Holt and a big 0 from Tony Scheffler? No problem, your team was still bad ass. It's probably good you decided to drop Tony this week; he's been awful. On another note, congratulations to beb for his new TE: Tony Scheffler! Good pickup, beb.
Standings: Whiteford dropped to 8th place with a 3-5 record, but 696 pts scored (4th in the league). Lenny, you're in 4th place with a 4-4 record and 763 pts scored (2nd overall).
Who dat Ninja 84 Hoosgow 76
Fucking Blickley, taking out my new favorite team. Joe, you had another great performance by Favre (25), and Lesean McCoy got a respectable 15. Everything else was poop. Blick, you did not have a great day by any means (21 from Romo; 19 from Gore was about it), but it was enough to beat the beloved Hoosgow. For those of you counting (and it's probably only me and Blick), that's 3 wins in a row for the ninjas.
Standings: Hoosgow fell to 7th place with a 4-4 record and 647 pts scored. Blickley is now the sole owner of 3rd place with a 5-3 record and 690 pts scored. Watch out for this team...there's a big trade in the works to give Blick the #1 receiver he needs to challenge Trey and Dois.
Try my product 91 Sovic's latest team name 81
Sovic called me 10 min before game time last Sunday to ask me if Calvin Johnson was playing (he wasn't). Since he didn't have another WR to fill in because of bye weeks and injuries, I offered to drop someone and add a free agent WR to his team. He responded, "just forget about it...my team is awful anyway." That pretty much sums up his season (I def fucked that quote up). At least SJAX had a good day with 22 pts. Beb, your rb tandem of Michael Turner (22) and Pierre Thomas (19) are finally starting to produce where you drafted them. Greg Jennings even had 14 pts. But...despite the win, a gay cloud hangs over the Try my Product locker room because Owen Daniels is probably out for the year. I'm sure Tony Scheff can pick up the slack...
Standings: Beb's in 6th place with a 4-4 record and 667 pts. Sovic dropped to 10th place with a 3-5 record and 648 pts scored.
White Mamba 73 I am Dr. Galiewackitx 67
Woof. this matchup was horrible. Trey, you did NOT deserve a win this week, but Larson's team is very bad (and with his $100 uber dollars left...he hasn't done anything to improve it). Larson, your lone bright spot was LT finally scoring 17 pts. yay. Trey, Aaron Rodgers had 28 pts, but the "holy shit" part of your week was Slaton's -1 on the day. He fumbled yet once again, and was benched for the game...which then caused you to go out and spend $89 uber dollars on Moats. You have $6 dollars left. Now, despite the fact that I think Moats was a one week wonder and was an absolutely awful pickup, the real problem is your lack of uber dollars. You're in 2nd place. Most likely, you're going to the playoffs. What happens if you have an injury and you want to add the guy's backup? You just guaranteed the fact you that will NOT be in the running for any hot free agents for the rest of the year...and I just think that's stupid. Only time will tell. I hope Moats does well for you this week anyway...oh that's right, he's on your bench.
Standings: Trey is in 2nd place with a 6-2 record and 737 pts. Larson's in 9th place with a 3-5 record and 652 pts (and three losses in a row).
Fire Al Groh 112 Caesar live here 73
God, it's getting tiresome writing about how good Dois's team is...and of course this was the blowout of the week. Other than a week 5 loss to the White Mamba, Bardey's been untouchable (well, you probably should have lost in week 4 when you only scored 68 pts...but Hoosgow only scored 60). Drew Brees, Chris Johnson, and Ray Rice continue to be fucking awesome. Dekker, Forte finally came out of his shell (with 24 pts), but you continue to suck (and have the lowest point total in the league).
Standings: Bardey's in frst place with a 7-1 record and has scored the most points in the league (792). Dekker, you slipped to 11th place with a 3-5 record and only 640 pts scored.
Week 9 preview:
Well, the shitty teams (bottom 4 of the standings) are playing each other this week. I face off against Larson, and dekker faces Sovic. As long as I get a win this week, I'm pretty much guaranteed to get out of the cellar. No matter what happens in either of these matchups, all of our teams will still suck.
Hoosgow vs. Milton Waddams along with try my product vs. Bromantic Ballsquad are both battles of the 4-4 teams. I say Joe and Beb win to take hold of 4th and 5th place (and one step close to the playoffs). Go Hoosgow!
Fire Al Groh vs. Pitchman: this is where Bardey goes 8-1 because AP is on bye. Lucky motherfucker.
Who Dat Ninja vs. White Mamba: This should be a good one. 2nd place takes on 3rd place. Same pledge class vs. same pledge class. Is Trey still mad that blick was SP and made us all look bad? Fuck yeah he is. Personally, I think Blick's going to destroy Trey this week (and so does the Yahoo prediction). Settle this.
Good luck, bitches.
6 comments:
first, when you said "who is also pregnant," i interpreted "also" to mean "in addition to katie." got all excited. had i missed some big announcement? then i realized that it meant "in addition to being our mutual friend" (i think). kind of disappointing.
also, you probably don't want to mention to katie that you think fucking pregnant girls is gross, because presumably she is going to get preggo at some point, and she's probably (inexplicably) going to want you to fuck her.
wv: bjersess - abbreviation in my daily planner for my weekly meeting with a fellatrix. Blow Jobber Session.
by the way, i don't know if fellatrix is a word, but i plan on using it a lot from here on out.
1. Katie is not pregnant.
2. it won't be gross when katie's pregant...but it is weird if I chose to sleep with a very pregnant woman that wasn't my wife.
3. I have no idea what that last part means...but I like it.
Yahoo actually predicts that I will win this weekend and you are right I went overboard with moats, but i am still glad i have him.
I love katie. Tell her I say hi.
Will - making up another dream on the spot in which you were faithful to get out of trouble is genius
That's the crazy thing...I didn't make it up. I actually had that dream the same night.
at least three times jenni has woken up pissed off at me for something that happened in a dream. most recently she had a dream in which i refused to go to a party with her and then told her i wanted to break up. incidentally, in the dream she was mostly hanging out with gwyneth paltrow talking about how i was a dick. she was pissed at me for like two hours after she got up for that one. nothing you can do about it.
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