Nude Tayne 106.2 Hoosgow 80.5 (recap by whiteford)
I have very little to say about my actual matchup against Joe so if you are reading this expecting something mostly about football I’d skip it entirely. If you want to read a little about my Thanksgiving with Will and his Dad then read on to the second paragraph. But let’s briefly get the fantasy stuff out of the way. It was pretty boring and went largely as predicted, i.e. Kyle Orton had a huge game, BJax had a lousy one, and the rest of my team was average. Joe’s only shining star on the other hand was Jamal Charles but that wasn’t nearly enough. So, down goes the hated Hoosgow.
Anyway, I spent my Thanksgiving eating turkey, not drinking alcohol, and watching the Dallas v NO game at some crazy people's house with a man who owned ~14,500 VHS tapes that were very loosely organized; however, were securely stored within a temperature and humidity controlled shed. He proceeded to trap me, my wife, Will, and Will’s father in the shed and describe in detail his collection, walking us through the stacks upon stacks of movies for about half an hour. My favorite sections were his "Exploitation" section (both of black people and women) and "Italian Horror" collection. Fascinating. This man is somehow part of Katie’s family so Will is the one that gets to visit every Thanksgiving. To make Will’s Dad look good (Dr. Shoaf was afraid of coming off badly due to lack of wine/nap and general crankiness) I had got to be the “bad cop”, which turned out to actually happen when I began loudly rooting against the Cowboys. Everyone loved me.
Dr Teeth 77.7 Boys on Boats 51 (recap by viche)
There is neither great pride nor much to say in winning a fantasy game with 78 points, but I just wrote an entry on my own blog about what a horrible owner Bryan Dick is (Shoaf, feel free to provide a link there; page views get me wet link...guys, this is worth a look. Great writing...ed note), so writing about my Uberleague opponent Chris Blickley should be an easy transition. Both Dick and Blick are 2-10 this season, but at least Dick has enough self-respect to start players at every position most weeks. Blickley decided that starting a D/ST in Week 12 would have been excessive, so despite having the Cleveland Browns on his roster, he left that slot blank. Not that it would have helped: pretty much the only player on this team of any value is Chris Johnson, and he dropped a big fat goose egg.
I shouldn't be so bothered, though, since Blick's ineptitude kept my playoff hopes alive despite a rather atrocious performance from the Electric Mayhem. I wasn't really paying attention Monday night, so I'm not sure how the Chargers score 36 points and Philip Rivers scores a mere 8, but as it happens Rivers was picked up by fellow AFC Wester Matt Cassel, who more than doubled anyone else in this contest with 28 points. Honestly, that's all there is to say about this game, except for the fact that I left Fred Jackson on the bench for the third straight week, and in those three weeks he's averaged 26 points. I'm gonna go ahead and start him this week, so naturally he'll be back into the single digits. I am one of an amazing six teams at 7-5, and the lone 6-6 team has a higher point total than me. Needless to say, I'm frightened. See you in the Consolation Bracket.
London's Lackey's 151.2 The Warfishes ditto 54 (recap by dois)
It was a Happy Thanksgiving indeed for the London’s Lackeys! Despite showing some signs of fight this year, the Detroit Lions are still the Detroit Lions and this year it was the Pats chance for an early turkey day feast. Golden Boy Tom Brady connected for 2 touchdowns to (recently added and inserted into the Lackey lineup that morning) Deion Branch. Really I could just stop right there. When Branch waltzed into the end zone for the 2nd time, this matchup was over. Brady’s 30.7 and Branch’s 24.3 were enough to outscore the entire woeful Warfish squad this week. Much like in Hammond’s delightful writeup last week, Trey can be thankful for Boys on Boats whose 51 points were the league low (although I am led to believe there was some problem with getting a DEF into the lineup – someone please right the ship over there. I hear Forshay is available as a co-manager). So Trey was fucked anyway but was especially let down by Chris Johnson’s 0.7 and the highly awaited return of Vincent Jackson which got the dreaded squadoosh (TM stat boy). Victory firmly in hand, the Men from Charlottesville nevertheless did not quit, knowing they are still in the hunt for the uber points total. Only Antonio Gates, returning after 2 weeks absence, failed to score in double figures as the Lackeys put up a league-leading 151 points to close the gap on the fat, evil commish to just 3.5 points going into the last week.
