Power Rankings part 2: The "at least I'm not as bad as Blick" tier

I'm a firm believer that the easiest way to increase success is by lowering expectations.  The next tier of teams can feel good about themselves not because their teams are actually playing well; rather, they can take solace in the fact that they're not as bad as Blick (or beb...you're right sovic, he should have been dropped down).  Well, all of the teams in this tier are 2-1...so...maybe the teams are actually decent.  I don't know.  I'm writing this as my students are completing an in-class essay.  I constantly have to look up to make sure they're not cheating.  I hate it when work gets in the way of fantasy.  I do know that Joe is still a bad owner.  That's a constant.

The Not as bad as Blick Tier:  Joe, whiteford, xadam

8. Hoosgow 2-1 -- 272.2 pts (Joe; 12 in the post draft rankings)

So, I was kind of off on Joe originally, but mostly just because I like to rank Joe low because he always makes a mistake in the draft.  Or calls me 2 minutes before the draft starts with questions like, "how does drafting work?"  Despite his current rank at 8, I have evidence to show his team is indeed awful.  

• Brett Favre is his qb
• Ryan matthews is hurt and might have lost his job to a fullback.
• On his bench, he has Antonio Bryant, who apparently plays on the nfl team "FA"
• He also has Early Doucet on his bench (who is OUT for quite a while) instead of in his IR spot (or released).

Yay, Joe!  Also, I play Joe this week while AP is on bye.  Son of a bitch.

7.  Nude Tayne 2-1 --  271.1 total points (whiteford; 5 in the post draft rankings)
Poor, poor, whiteford.  He won the league last year, and came into this season with a huge cock on his shoulder.    After the draft, I ranked him 5th because I thought he paid "too much for Grant; he sucks."  Oh, how true it was.  Well, I'll forgive the huge price you paid for him since he suffered a season ending injury.  But...his starting QB got injured as well, and then benched for Ron Mexico.  Oh, Andre Johnson was hurt last game as well.  Wait, he also blew his free agent load on Brandon Jackson ($92) who gained 12 yards on 7 carries last week and lost his job to some white fullback named John Kuhn.  Yikes.  Whiteford is 2-1, and despite winning a nailbiter with Trey last week, I predict a freefall to Blick/Beb territory.  However, whiteford is an active owner, so maybe he can add some good players from the waiver wire (oh wait...he has no free agent money).

6.  Terrible Terry Tate 2-1 -- 291.1 pts (xadam; 4 in the post draft rankings)
The new guy has done fairly well so far.  He beat Dekker and Steuber, but lost to Hoosgow (that always hurts).  However, there are 3 key reasons why he gets put in this middle tier.

• He and whiteford are gay for each other so they need to be ranked together.
• I hate vince Young
• I'm not sold on Ray Rice

Rice might pick it up and rush just like he did last year.  However, he just seems slower and injury prone this year.  I'm not sure the 24th rb in the league is earning his $63 dollar draft price tag.

I'll be combining the last 2 tiers in part 3 tomorrow.  

Week 3 power rankings Part 1: The Shitty ones

Things have been a bit rough in the Shoaf household lately.  My wife wants a dog...but not just any dog.  She fell in love with a rescue dog with 3 legs.  I really don't have a desire to have a dog right now, and if I did, I would prefer it to have more than 3 legs.  But, when the wife puts her foot down...there's not much I can do.  I refused to go see the dog, so she took her ENTIRE family with her instead.  Then the foster parents of the dog emailed me this video:



I think it's safe to say that I'll be getting a dog.

I never finished writeups for weeks 2 and 3, so I'm going to do some power rankings instead (they're more fun to write).  I'll be releasing them in 3 part installments:  First up, in honor of my future 3 legged dog: the shitty teams.

Bottom of the barrel: Blickly, Steuber, Trey and Beb
12.  Boys on Boats 0-3 (Blick; post draft ranking of 10).
I think I was pretty on the mark with my post-draft analysis of this team.  Chris Johnson is awesome; the rest of this team is garbage.  However, he did swing the trade for Deangelo, which has netted him 13.8 pts over the last two weeks.  Yay!  The team still sucks.  Being in Costa Rica for the draft hurts.  He's 0-3 and 11th in the league in scoring.  It was easy to slot him into 12th.  I will admit, however, that his 95 points in week 3 were an improvement.  Too bad he had to run into the juggernaut that is Fat Wolverine.

11.  Steuberleague  0-3 (post draft ranking of 9).
In the draft, Steuber went all in with Brees, but then didn't really spend much on other guys...which is pretty much what his team has been doing.  Brees is fine, and Maclin has a great week 3, but his team isn't getting it done.  However, it might have something to do with the fact that he kept knowshon in his lineup even though he wasn't playing.   Dumbass ownership.  Winless and 10th in the league in scoring.  Easy choice for #11.

10.  The Warfishes The Warfishes 0-3 (Trey; post draft ranking of 2).
Wow, I was way off on this one.  After the draft, I really liked this team: peyton, sjax, Beanie Wells, Fitz...but of the 4, only Peyton has done his thing.  Beanie's been hurt ( but had a good week 3), sjax still plays for the Rams (who are still sucky even though they beat the skins last week), and Fitz is crying for Kurt.  Trey, it's time to swing a trade.  You're winless and  9th in the league in scoring.

9.  Manning and Me 1-2 (Beb; post draft ranking of 6).
So, beb's team has been awful.  He's LAST in the league in scoring.  Shonn Greene has been garbage.  Michael Turner has been hurt.  His two qb's are eli manning and carson palmer...just unspeakably bad.  However, this is a head to head league, and beb has 1 more win (against Blick of course) than Trey, Steuber, and Blick.  So, he gets to be #9 in the power poll, but still included in the shitty tier of teams.

Week 1 in review

"I hate my injured fantasy team and I hate all of you..."

Oh, how wonderful.  Fantasy season has begun.  Week one is always exciting for the surprising blow-ups from "has beens" (Forte with 31!  Ochocinco with 23!), the relative newcomers with huge days (Hakeem Nicks with 25), and the "sure things" who crap all over the field (Andre Johnson with 3).
So, I know this fractional scoring thing is awesome, but I'm probably going to round up/down in these writeups occasionally because I can't remember decimals when I switch back and forth between the blog and the box scores...and I'm lazy.
(special thanks to dois who fed me the stats when I couldn't get on the site at work)

Wolverine's Fat Brother 78.7   Manning and Me 63
Oh, how sweet it is.  On Sunday, Beb, whiteford, and Trey came over to watch the early games.  For almost

What a trade!

We had a big trade go down this morning between Dekker and Blickley (and I assume it was chatted and talked over the past couple days).  Dekker gives up his favorite player, Deangelo 83, along with Braylon Edwards (prob crap) and Kellen Winslow (maybe good if he can stay on the field).  In return, Dekker gets Ronnie Brown (could be amazing if healthy), Mike Wallace (prob going to supplant Hines as Pitt's #1 receiver this year), and Jermichael Finley (who EVERYONE loves this year due to his matchup problems for other teams).
Blick, for your sake, I hope Deangelo goes OFF this year, because at first glance, you got hosed in this trade.  Dekker, well played, sir.  You were able to get rid of Deangelo 83 (so I can't make fun of you all year), replace him somewhat with Ronnie Brown, and also get better at WR and TE.  Despite the awesomeness of this trade, do you feel a bit of guilt for offering this trade to Blick (the only guy who prob doesn't understand the significance of Deangelo 83)?  I mean, it's his fault for missing the draft...but still.
Blick, as long as Deangelo is moderately good, pairing him with Chris Johnson is pretty amazing in itself...so you'll prob still be good.